The Importance of Having a Voice

My mom and I were talking about this last night. She is the kind of person who when she's angry at someone or is hurt by someone... she tends to bottle it all up inside of herself and let it fester and brew. That's just not me. I don't always choose to be directly confrontational with everyone who hurts me or fills me with the kind of anger that makes you just shake all over with rage, however, one way or another I will have my voice heard.


I think bottling things up inside of you only does bad things... first of all, it causes the anger to grow, which stresses you out (at least it does me) and stress is bad for your heart.. your body in general and has been said to significantly shorten your life. And since I'd like to live and enjoy my kids and family as long as possible, I don't think those that cause me anger and hurt are worth the energy it takes to bottle up that hurt inside of me. That only hurts me more and causes me more problems. Therefore, I will always have my voice heard.


I know it's not "politically correct" to some for me to host my occasional venting sessions on here, however, that is not really a care of mine. Even when I am at my highest point of anger, I rarely say things that I don't mean a hundred percent. I may say them in an angrier voice than I would if I wasn't angry, but if I say it.... odds are I mean it.


But I'm thinking I am going to go ahead and do what a couple friends of mine have done. I'm going to open a seperate, private blog to put anything that is not fluffy and happy on. There are people in all of our lives... well, hopefully just one person, because honestly, more than one would be completely exhausting... who live solely for the purpose of causing trouble. You all know one. I hope I'm not the only one who knows one. Even if they live nowhere near you, they will find their way to cause trouble. Therefore, I'm just going to post my low moments where only those who can handle that kind of information like an adult can read it. I think that's best because I don't want this blog to be private. I like it being public. I love getting comments from nice people I love, like, and even from ones I don't even know. It would be great if blogger would come up with a function that would allow you to block readers from just a certain place.. like a city or even state... or address.. something, I don't know... but since I'm not a person in charge at google, I'll have to deal with the fact that public really means.... EVERYONE! :)


And if you wonder why I must write my low feelings out somewhere rather than just saying it to someone... well, Tony's not here, my house is me and two little ones and I would most of the time rather vent to someone my own age rather than to my grandma or my mom. They're the only two adults that I see on pretty much a daily basis. And I'm not a huge phone person. I loved talking on the phone before I had kids, I could talk for hours on end, but these days I just don't usually have time for long phone conversations. Don't get me wrong, I love getting calls from my lovely friends, I just usually don't have huge slots of time available for lengthy venting sessions. :) Also, I love writing. It's one of my very favorite things. Definitely top 3 on my list of how I prefer to express myself, so therefore, I will almost always write about my annoyances, hurts, pains, guilts, happy times, joyous occasions, and the like. It's just me and I won't change to suit someone else's personality. :)


Sorry if my honesty offends anyone, that's me... take it or leave it.... :) At least you don't ever have to wonder if I'm lying to your face. I can promise you.... I won't! :) Anyway, I"m a horrible liar. You can always tell when I'm lying. My voice totally gives me away. :)